The Outpour

So Texas.

It’s hot.

Like the kind of hot where you go outside, the heat jumps into your throat, it becomes hard to breathe for a moment kind of hot.

The kind of hot where you just move slower, like you’re pushing through some kind of heavy substance careful not to touch any skin on skin kind of hot.

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I love the heat.  My body just sinks into the heavy air like it’s some kind of pillow ready to catch me.

Maybe that’s just my hypothyroid talkin’, or maybe it’s just the Texan, or maybe it’s just the crazy.

I usually flourish emotionally and energetically in the hot Texas summers but for quite a while I was really struggling.  There was absolutely no rhyme or reason to it.  I was just walking through the deepest, darkest pits of hell.

If my mind could explain it, I would have reasoned out of it.  But I was stuck, my mind had turned against me and I felt alone, confused, and tired.

We can all connect to suffering of some kind.  We’ve all been in a place where we feel like there is no hope.

But there is a design to this world.  And there are seasons.  Even in Texas.

It’s drizzling this evening.  The temperature has dropped and there is a nice breeze.  The night is still.

The suffering will end.  There is Hope.

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I had been staring at a empty canvases for months on end.  Maybe I needed this season of quiet just to get all this color out :)

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